Goodbye 2023

 12/31/23 good bye cya

So Far in 2012

I am going to try and write more regularly this year - we'll see how it goes.

We had a fantastically fun New Year's Eve. Ty and Leah were at the house and and we watched a movie, played together, banged pans on the front porch. On Sunday we watched football, Ty shot pellet guns with Grandpa, Leah and I went shopping.

Where did banging pans on the front porch come from? Leah asked me, and I said - I did it as a kid, her Mom did it, and now they are doing it. It's a tradition. That's all I know.

This past weekend started on Friday with a huge correction caused by something I ate on Thursday. Major GI issues, and the worse gout attack I've had in 5 - 10 years. I literally could barely walk on Friday and Saturday. Sunday - somewhat better, and today I can wear my shoes.

Never again will that food pass these lips.

Mine Eyes Have Seen The Glory

This past Wednesday my eye surgery on my cataracts was completed. I now look at the world through two eyes uncovered by glasses. (OK, I do wear readers for computer work) My vision is crisp and clear. It is amazing! I cannot say more than that. After so many years of poor vision, I can see. The funny thing is that I still reach for my glasses each morning, and for just a moment, when I just wake up, I wonder why I slept in my glasses.
On Thursday, at my post op visit, one of the nurses asked my if I would speak to one of Dr. Sifri's patients who just learned she needed cataract surgery. She was on the fence about whether or not she should get it done. I spoke to her about my experience, about what it was like the week between surgeries - when one eye was done and the other not. I explained how bad my vision was, and how good it is now. I also told her the surgery was basically pain free. I know I helped her over her fear.
I am reminded how lucky I am each time I go outside and see the clear crisp sky, trees, and lawn. These things, as well as the technology to replace a damaged eye lens, are truly a gift from God.

My day with Aunt Mary

Sunday Sharon Howard called me and asked if I would visit Aunt Mary. They were out of town, and her home had sent her to the hospital because her speech was bad, and she had some facial drooping.
When I arrived, she seemed happy to see me, after I explained who I was. She definitely remembered Elmer! We had a great visit, looked at old pictures and talked about Dad and Uncle Yatz. And she napped.
When she woke from her nap, though, she became very agitated. She was worried about me leaving, and seemed very disoriented. He speech was markedly more slurred, and I also saw some facial drooping. I tried to calm her fears, without promising to spend the night. I also asked the nurse if she could have something for her anxiety.
Aunt Mary was hooked up to wires, and an IV, and was restrained in her bed so she wouldn't get up. She understood that we had to call the nurse for restroom time. And recognized when she had to go.
She ate very little supper, about 5 bytes of meat, a very small potato, and 2 bytes of applesauce. She was worried about me eating and told me to finish off her meal. I told her I had some pretzels, so I was good.
I said my weekly rosary with Aunt Mary, I had an extra one so I gave it to her. Several times she looked at it in her hand and seemed surprised that she held it. But I could tell she knew we were going to pray, 'cause she folded her hands. As we (ok I) prayed, she fell asleep around the second decade. She looked very peaceful.
When she awoke, she was again very agitated and worried about me leaving her. We had a 30 minute conversation that was mostly gibberish on her side. I could occasionally pick out a word. But I sensed that she wanted me to ask the nurse if I could spend the night.
I asked if they would give her the anxiety medicine. She was soon feeling OK and even smiled and said OK when I told her I had to go. Her nurse promised to wait in the hall for a bit so she would be there if she became anxious or upset.
My day with Aunt Mary was such a blessing. A couple of times when she looked at me I saw Dad's face and expressions. But no one has her laugh. I got to hear that a couple of times. And see her sweet, sweet smile. Love you, Aunt Mary.

Football

Saturday morning / afternoon is football time. Leah cheers at 11:30, Ty plays at 2:00. So even though the temp was predicted as 99 on Saturday, the game must be played.
Saturday the game was in Glen Este, way on the East side of town. We left late from Julie and Curts house, only to arrive 20 mins before game time. But, the 7 yr olds weren't even playing yet. So we waited, and waited in the hot shade, moving our chairs until we ran out of places in the shade.
Leah's coach secured the right for them to cheer in the end zone - a spot that was shady at first, but by the end of the game, only 2 girls were in the shade.
And then we waited for Ty's game. By this time we moved our chairs over to the home team's side, because they had all the shade, and we cheered as Ty's team won 26 - 6.
Poor Ty was done in by the heat. But he played OK, just very sweaty and hot.
I arrived home around 5:00, gritty with sweat and a layer of dust. I had survived the heat! I was so happy to be home.

My Brushes With the Law

Today started out like any other when I work from home. It was quiet and uneventful. Until Joe came home from the post office with the mail. He handed me a small post card from the state of Ohio. My driver's license had expired at the end of July - on my birthday.
I was shocked. Hadn't I just got a speeding ticket with that expired license?
Normally I would just go get it renewed. But, with the shape of my eyes, I wasn't sure I would pass the eye test. My right eye - the strong one, is really bad.
So I called the doctor's office - 922----, thinking they could give me an opinion as to whether or not I would pass the eye test. When the call was answered I heard "Butler County 911" ! I apologized and explained I dialed wrong - I'm so sorry.
I redialed the doctor who said I should pass with both eyes. And I spoke to the BMV and they said I just had to see the big number with one eye, so I decided to chance the renewal.
Before I could leave the house I needed a shower. I was 1 step away from being in the water, when the dogs went crazy. Someone was at the door. I threw on my dress and went to see who it could be. Oh, just the POLICE! They were checking on me since there was a 911 hangup.
After he left, It finally hit me that I would have to get my picture taken - and it would last 4 years. This license renewal required full hair and makeup. Cr^p.
And so I showered, curled my hair, put on makeup, put on a top that would photograph well, and drove myself to the BMV. I barely passed the eye test, but I did. I now have a new license - with the best photo I have ever taken.

RIP Shirley Meurer

On Sunday I went to Shirley Meurer's wake. It was in Delhi - at the same funeral home that handled Dad's service. I was a little spooked about going because of that, and because I hadn't seen or talked to Shirley's kids in something like 40 years.
But, for Mom and Dad, I went. I stopped by the cemetery first to say hello to Dad and Mom, and to let them know Shirley was on the way. The cemetery was closed, so I yelled through the fence.
Then on to the funeral home. It was a step back into my past. Shirley and her family lived behind us when I was growing up. We spent many hours at their house. Dad and Mom were closer, though. Their friendship endured, kept alive by bridge games and dinners.
When I entered the funeral home I was greeted by Colleen, and Amy, two of her younger daughters. I spoke to Greg - the oldest, and Joe who is my age. And Kathy - who is a Bill's age. Everyone but Mary - I'm not sure she was there. I listened to many Shirley stories, her humor was well known, and learned she was known to many as St. Shirl.
After the family, I moved on to others. I walked up to a circle of white haired little ladies and introduced myself as Barb Perzel. OMG they were so happy to see me! Mothers of friends from Delhi Swim Club, and friends of my parents. They told me how much the miss Dad and Mom. I heard that I look like Mom, I also heard I look like Dad. And I heard I have Dad's laugh.
I saw most of the Hater family - Diane, Donna, and Mark. I saw Kathy Grote and Gayle Plogstead. I saw Mrs Hater, Mrs. Mathers, Mrs. Grote and so many more semi familiar faces.
I also learned Mr. Plogstead passed away 4 months ago.

And so - the circle of life has completed for Shirley. Please say hi to Dad and Mom for me.

The Eyes Have It

When I was talking to one of my team mates from Milwaukee, I was explaining the history of my eye doctor. As a child, I saw Dr. David Sifri, my eye doctor's father. Sitting in the waiting room brought back memories of sitting in those same chairs when I was 10 or 11 years old. Dr. David's son Mike, is my doctor now. He is dark skinned, with curly dark hair. He is tall, slim, muscular, and athletic. He has a tremendous energy you can feel. My friend says I have nothing wrong with my eyes!
So Tuesday night I received a call - my surgery was cancelled. The doctor had an emergency. As the week progressed, I discovered he has a bad back and it went out on him. He is having a procedure done, and needs 10 days to recover. My surgery now is scheduled for September 7th and September 14th. Right when I did not want it to be.
Laura Martin's wedding is September 10th. I bought a new dress, I have a hair appointment planned, and a mani-pedi. And now, I won't be able to wear eye makeup, and will only be able to see out of one eye. I think I am getting a lesson in humility.

Surgery Prep

Yesterday I was back at the eye doctor's office to get my eyes measured. The good news is that Dr. Sifri has worked on someone whose eyes are worse than mine. He says it will be a month or so after surgery before he will test my eyes again to see if I still need glasses. That gives the implanted lens time to settle into my eye.
Apparently I will be awake during the surgery - that lasts like 10 to 15 minutes. But I will be very high. If I'm nervous, I can take a xanax before the surgery.
Today I went to my regular doctor for the pre-op physical. I was in her office on Monday and somehow between Monday and Friday I lost 4 pounds. So now I'm ready - just waiting on Wednesday.

Eye Doctor Visit

Yesterday I went to the eye doctor. Dr. Sifri. The son of the Dr. Sifri that I went to as a child. I went to the same office, sat in the same chairs, and saw a younger, cuter version of the doctor of my youth.
Then this young cute doctor said I have cataracts. Isn't that something old people get? He said people with my extreme nearsightedness often develop cataracts. So, next week I have surgery on one of my eyes, and the following week the other.
I'm a little nervous.

Lauren's Bridal Shower

On Sunday we had a bridal shower for Lauren at deShas. It was mostly family - and a couple of Lauren's friends. I was looking forward to seeing my sisters. And of course - that was fabulous. Julie worked hard on Lauren's cake - wanting it to be perfect.
But what struck me the most was Aunt Birtie. We four Perzel sisters gravitated to her, circled around her like 4 little butterflys. Hungry for our Mother - and Aunt Birtie has a piece of her, the same familial DNA, the same cursive writing style, the same smile.
We missed you at the shower, Mom.

40 Bags For 40 days

Last year I had an ambitous Lenten project - to rid my home of 40 bags of stuff - 1 for each of the 40 days of Lent. This year I have been such a slacker - but prodded by my cousin Marianne Peck, I am challenging my family to jointly come up with 40 bags of stuff in 40 days.
This year I am beginning with my bedroom closet - which is exactly where I began last year! Round 2 should do it - I hope.
So - last weekend I filled 1 bag.
Here is the challenge - daughter and sons, cousins, sisters-in-law, nieces and nephews - can we jointly come up with 40 bags of stuff to pitch or donate this Lent?

RIP Tom Kohl

Uncle Tom died last Monday morning March 14th. He had lots of health problems for many years, so for him there is relief, for his family - sadness. Here are some things I learned this week about my family this weekend. Uncle Tom received 4 purple hearts during WWII. He was a paratrooper in the South Pacific, accomplished 85 jumps.
Friday night the priest spoke of Tom's service, and encouraged us to perform 1 act of courage this weekend, as Tom displayed courage throughout his life. Aunt Louise met Uncle Tom in Japan, after the war. Apparently the government was looking for American workers to go overseas to Germany and Japan after the war. Aunt Louise lived in Japan for a year. She and Uncle Tom kept in touch after they both returned from overseas - he was from Pennsylvania. They were married 3 years later.
On a lighter note, I learned something about my cousin. My cousin Casey is the middle son, and we called called him Casey, and I spelled it mentally Casey. I asked him Friday night where the Casey came from. He said "my name - Kevin Charles". Oh, KC not Casey. Duh.
My cousin Johnny is also a 4th degree knight in the Knights of Columbus, as Uncle Tom was. He was asked to speak at the funeral Mass, about Uncle Tom. He did a fabulous job, and I complimented him at the lunch reception after the funeral. He said it was a total surprise, that Father asked him to do it right before the service. I told him he could certainly put a check in the act of courage box.
My cousins Andrea and Sharon were there, and we became part of a "cousins" family picture. It was fun, and just reinforces the family bond. I haven't seen my cousins Tommy, KC, and Johnny in many years - more than 10. But they are family, and it felt comfortable, and well wonderful. Family.
Rest In Peace Uncle Tom. You were married to Aunt Louise 61 years, left 3 good sons, and many grandchildren. You are well loved. It was time for you to go Home.

30th Wedding Anniversary

Today is our 30th wedding anniversary. We were going out Saturday to celebrate, but I was in the middle of the great winter sickness - that lasted 4 days for me.
I wanted our 30th to be special - to do something we've never done before.
And so I sit here alone. Been deathly sick for 4 days. Haven't taken a shower in two days. Had to make soup for supper - still can't eat anything solid. I worked all day from home. Joe went in to work, then went off to teach his martial arts classes. I still have some Christmas shopping to do. Joe got me a wonderful card for our anniversary, I got him nada. Not a word from any of the kids about our anniversary. 30 years is something to celebrate! When we got married so quickly with no honeymoon, just a night at a motel, did I envision I would be here in this place 30 years in the future? No - maybe I should have.

My weekend

The last couple of weeks have been pretty crazy at our house. Well since a couple of weeks before Thanksgiving, really. Joe and I set aside Saturday to go to dinner to celebrate our 30th anniversary. Nothing, especially my work, is going to get in the way. We were going to P F Changs, one of my favorite places to eat - that we save for special treats. I took Friday off work because I'd already worked 43 hours so I tried to just be done.
I woke up Friday morning with a sicky belly as my grand kids say. I took all the Immodium I had, and it wasn't working, so I went to the store in the afternoon for more Immodium, Pepto Bismal, Ginger Ale, and pretzels. I was so thirsty I took a huge cup of water with me to drink. Without going into details, let's just say I didn't make it through my shopping trip. After trying to clean up, I got my cart and tried to check out. I felt like I was going to faint, and my vision was blurred by black spots. I asked the checkout girl if she could load my cart onto the belt - and handed her my credit card. The store manager came up and asked me if I felt OK. When I said no, he got me a wheelchair to sit in. We tried to call Joe, but Joe didn't answer, and I'd left my cell at home. (That becomes important later.)
The store manager asked me what I had to eat today - and I realized I'd had 1 piece of toast. He asked me if I wanted a candy bar, but I told him I had gushers in one of my bags, so he found them and handed me a pack. After I ate them I felt much better. The manager had someone load the groceries in the car, and I convinced him I felt well enough to drive.
In fact, while on the way home I decided to go to the post office and get our mail. So - at the post office, I grabbed the box key and went in. On my way back out I couldn't find my car keys. I had, in fact, locked them in the car, along with my purse with $700 in it, and the extra car key.
So - back into the post office to call Joe from their phone - since I forgot my cell. This time he answered, and I explained what was going on and told him my rescue was in his hands. He was able to get JR, who said he could be there in 20 minutes.
So - I went to the Okeana Mini-Mart where they got me a medal folding chair and a diet pepsi. For the next half hour I sat in the chair and chatted with 2 of the nicest people, summer teeth and all.
JR got me home, I took a shower and went to bed.
I was now in full blown sickness.

Out of the Blue

Yesterday my niece Lauren sent out a tweet - looking for suggestions for an amazing wedding DJ. I was thinking about that this morning on my way to work. Which led to me thinking how much Mom would have loved being there for Lauren's graduation and wedding and Steph's graduation next year. Out of nowhere, the tears started flowing, for just a few minutes. It makes me sad.

Mary - Our Lady Of Surprises

Our Lady Of Surprises
O, Mary my mother and Our Lady of surprises,
what a happy joy you caused the wedding guests, when you asked your Divine Son
to work the miracle of water into Wine
What a happy surprise for them, since they
thought the wine had run dry, I too Mary,
love surprises, and as your child,
may I ask you to favour me with one today.
I ask this only because you are
my ever caring Mother, Amen.
=====================

When Angels Rush In

Into this silent night
as we make our weary way
we know not where,
just when the night becomes its darkest
and we cannot see our path,
just then
is when angels rush in,
their hands full of stars

by Ann Weems

An Anniversary of Sorts

This weekend Joe and I are celebrating the 30th anniversary of our first date. I'm not sure of the specific day - but it was the weekend before my birthday. To mark this great occasion, we're going out on a date! We planned this earlier in the week, and I've been looking forward to it since then. I even got a little teary when I told someone at work about it.
So - we have a reservation at Bonefish Grill for 7:30. I'm excited! Joe and Les are in Michigan this weekend, we're all alone. Hmmm, what could possibly happen?

And on the 83rd Day

And on the 83rd Day - she rests. I am 83 days into my work year and taking my first official 8 hours in a row off - tomorrow. That includes holidays (which I worked through).
I am going to the paint store to pick out a paint color for the front porch, and Home Depot to buy dirt bags (LOL) to fill in some ruts from this winter. I am putting away my winter clothes - I think warm weather is here for a bit. Someone is coming over tomorrow to fix the hot tub. And tomorrow evening we are celebrating Curt's 40th birthday. Sounds restful to me!

Happy Birthday Mom!

Today is Mom's Birthday. I was up at 5:30 so I could make 7:30 Mass. It was peaceful and just what I needed. Got a little weepy twice - but otherwise I'm good.
I had an 8:30 appointment for my annual exam. After some talking to the doc, she remarked that my life has been crap for the last year. True dat. I also got a little weepy with her, but she was cool - said it was better to get it out than leave it in. As the day rolled on, though, I got less weepy - as my mind focused on the tasks at hand.
As I think about poor me, I am reminded of my 40 something friend Amy what had open heart surgery yesterday. She is doing well, thank God. Just puts things in perspective, ya know?

Happy Birthday, Dad

Today is Dad's birthday. He would have been 84 today. Happy Birthday Dad. I miss you.

New Phones

Last Saturday we all got new phones. JR dropped his pone in a bucket of paint thinner and melted one. Our contract was up with Nextel, so we switched to Verizon. Much better service at home.
Joe and I each got a Palm Pre, JR and Les LG Chocolates. I guess I have finally reached the age where I can't work new electronic gadgets. The new phones have fixed my "talking on the phone while driving" habit - since I can't figure out how to call anyone - or how to find their number.
Yesterday I took a picture of a tree Joe and I planted last fall - I was able to upload it to facebook - so that was cool. Can't find where it resides on my phone though. I had to upload to facebook, and download to my PC.
The Palm Pre has lots of great features - if I can just figure out how to use them. And how to call someone.

On Good Friday, Honoring The Dead, Visiting Family

Yesterday was Good Friday. It was a beautiful day - 84 degrees and sunny. I left late morning to go to the cemetery to make a round of visits. I stopped first to buy flowers, and brought along a plastic Bengal cup as a vase. At old St. Joseph Cemetery I stopped first at Mom and Dad's place. I dropped off an Easter lily, and sat for a few moments, said some prayers. I actually didn't want to stay too long, I am still so sad that they are both gone. The next stop was Grandpa and Grandma Perzel - John and Mary Perzel. I dropped off some mums and said some more prayers.
My next stop was at the new St. Joseph Cemetery where I visited Joe's Mom and Dad, Bob and Ruth Kessen, dropped of more mums. Then I went on a search for Joe's brother Ron. In the past, I have not been able to locate him. But, following Joe's sister Donna's instructions, I found him this time. In the same section as Bob and Ruth, 2 1/2 trees up the hill, about 14 markers in from the road. Once I found him, I filled the Bengals cup with water and left some cut flowers for him. More prayers were said.
After my visit with the deceased family members, I stopped by Donna's house for a late lunch. My niece Kristin also came over, and a couple of Donna's friends. We ate fish from the Alabama Fish Market, sunned ourselves on the deck, and talked. For several hours. It was peaceful and relaxing.
I wondered if my actions dishonored the great sacrifice that Jesus made on that day, because I didn't spend the day in sorrowful prayer, contemplating His death. I think that I spent the day enjoying the life that Jesus died to give me, honoring the dead, and enjoying the living. It's all good.

Exhausted

I am exhausted. I am working 12 - 16 hour days - have been for the last 10 days. It looks like I have another week to go, if I live that long. I am working and sleeping.
My house has gone to hell. I've been working from home again for the past week, when my car died on the highway on my way home from work. It was finally fixed today, and I'm $300 poorer. Since the weather has warmed up, the snow melted, and it poured rain last weekend, the dogs have been enjoying a bit of digging in the yard. Yesterday they captured a mole - they were so proud. They come to the house covered with mud. Although I try to make sure everyone knows to towel off the dogs before they come in, sadly it's not always possible. My kitchen is covered with dry muddy dog footprints, and dried mud smears where they lay down. They also mucked up the living room carpet yesterday. It's so depressing. Saturday - on my 1 day off, the house was clean and sparkling. Today - 3 days later - it's a disaster. Today I complained (bitched) that no one else seems to know how to clean up. Another sad but true statement.
I'm going to bed, because I AM EXHAUSTED!

Friday

It's Friday, and the weekend is supposed to be sunny. Tomorrow I am going to Leah and Ty's basketball games in the morning. It's Leah's last game, Ty's second last. I need some recreation! I am swamped at work, and am having trouble getting rid of the stress each night. Last night I even dreamed of work. Sigh.
Joe, Les and I watched the movie - The Time Traveler's Wife last night. I was hoping for some easy going entertainment - but I didn't find it there. The movie was OK, but a bit weird, and I had to pay attention. So - that was a problem.
I'm hoping to work in the yard some in the afternoon - there are lots of sticks to pick up, and other things to clean up. It's supposed to be sunny and 50. Sunday I'll be working. Sigh.

Hello Happy Happy March!

February is over and I say "Good Riddance". It was full of snow and cold and dry noses and earaches and sore throats and hours in my back room working from home, while the space heater blasted and the snow piled up outside my window.
And now lovely lovely March is here! I feel warmer just thinking about it. Julie tells me her hyacinths are peeking out of the ground, and a friend in York, Pa says he has some daffodils coming up. See? It's a wonderful month to be alive!

The weekend

This weekend was pretty crazy. With Joe unable to do any lifting (nothing more than 5 pounds), many tasks that he usually does were left up to me. So - I brought in wood, hauled 3 loads of laundry up from the basement, drug in bags and bags of groceries. Let me say my back is killing me!
On a different and less whiney note, I did manage to collect 4 bags of stuff to pitch. I emptied out cabinets in my kitchen that I rarely go in to. I'm ashamed to say I even found a stash of sippy cups - hopefully from Ty and Leah, and not from my kids - the youngest will be 26 on March 29! I found a thermos and water bottles my boys used in sports - so they were ancient - and now GONE! The cabinet over my fridge is totally empty.
My total number of bags is now 7. I'm way behind.

Joe's Angiogram Update

Here's the latest news. Joe's angiogram was good. His heart is strong, and his arteries are flowing well. Having said that - the chest pains (angina) he's having is probably caused by clogged capillaries, which they can only treat with medicine. They have given him a new medicine, used for adults with chronic angina. He is doing well this morning, getting ready to take Rocky to the vet right now. Still having some chest pain, but taking things slowly.

Joe - Heart troubles again

Tomorrow we are heading back to the hospital for another angiogram for Joe. He has been experiencing cheat pains for most of this month, and has been holding out for an office visit that was supposed to be happening today. The chest pain seems to be worse than in the past. Last Thursday he had a stress test done at the cardiologist. Over the weekend, he was really doing poorly, so I encouraged him to call the doctor Monday morning. He found out the result of his stress test was OK, so that was good - but did not explain his pain. So the doctor cancelled his appointment and scheduled him for the angiogram. I know Joe feels they will certainly be putting in a new stent. I guess Friday will tell.

40 Bags Update

Since I posted on Ash Wednesday, I have completed a total of 1 bag. I have come down with a sore throat and earache, and have been feeling sick for the last 2 days. Today I am sonewhat better, so far. My goal is 6 bags by the end of day Sunday.